The Sovereign Alchemist

I thought I was going to be a pastor. I grew up in the Seventh-day Adventist church, and from a young age I knew I was meant to be a healer, a teacher, a guide.

The path I was handed came with conditions: be good, be quiet, be small. So I shaped myself to fit. I learned to perform the part and to earn love by abandoning myself, and I mistook obedience for holiness.

Something in me refused. I came to call that refusal a sacred rebellion: the decision not to silence the parts of me that did not fit, my queerness, my intuition and my fire among them. That refusal became my freedom.

The road from there ran through trauma, grief, devotion, therapy, shadow work and wonder. What I found at the end of it was not the absence of God, but the wild and radiant sense that the Divine lives in all things.

That is the ground this practice stands on. This is not about fixing you. It is about remembering who you already are, and taking back what you gave up in order to belong.